Chad Ocho Cinco’s Child Please Commentaries

Chad Johnson: Seven days since you’ve heard the platinum voice of the platinum playmaker, the voice of authority, the voice of reason, the voice of Ocho Cinco. Two days until I present a twitter surprise to the NFL. What’s the surprise? The NFL knows… They know what they get when I touch the field every Sunday. They get an icon whose celebrations are incomparable. They get an ATM machine, when they fine me. They get a role model, who works hard, does it all right, who shows the kids that if act like a star, they will be a star. And they get their very own version of Sixty Minutes, All Things Considered, Dateline, and Primetime… The Child Please commentaries…
CP Commentary One: You know President Obama love his haters, like Ocho Cinco love my hates, but Wednesday night, President Obama’s haters hated during his speech. President Obama says no illegal immigrants get health care, Ocho Cinco all good with that, but Congressman Joe Wilson, he yells out YOU LIE in the speech. Congressman Joe Wilson? CHILD PLEASE. I did a quick google search, between google searches of myself, and I see Congressman No One Knows and yellow cake. That’s the last thing Ocho Cinco need, some no one knows cracka ass cracka yellin things at our President. You yellin in the middle of the speech is like Champ Bailey trash talking me on Sunday. When I the score the six, it’s him that lie. When President Obama pass healthcare, it’s Joe No that lie.

CP Commentary Two: Brett Favre, Bret Favre, Bret Favre, Bret Favre… Ocho Cinco over Brett Favre, but now he say he may not play the whole year. CHILD PLEASE. Ocho Cinco may not either. Ocho Cinco plan to relax, get it all ready, sit out weeks fifteen, sixteen, and seventeen after Carson and I clinch the division title. It’s just like Ocho Cinco’s new favorite song… We see Miami, Brett

CP Commentary Three: According to ESPN, Brandon Marshall may sign an extension. First, Denver fires they coach. Then, they hire a teenager. Then, they trade the quarterback. Now, they hate, love, hate, love, hate, love they problem child and they match Chump Barely against the Platinum Playmaker. Denver, as an organization, they not even an organization anymore, they a University of Colorado future female kicker training academy… Denver, get a big CHILD PLEASE.

Chad Johnson: Until next time, this is Eighty-five, aka Ocho Cinco, aka the Black Mexican saying in Chad You Must Trust… Twitter Surprise!

Contributors: Platinum Smalls & Rick Morris of the FDH Lounge