Chad Ocho Cinco’s Child Please Commentaries

Chad Johnson: Twenty-eight seconds? Ocho Cinco can’t execute a celebration in twenty-eight seconds. Ocho Cinco can’t promote my you stream show in twenty-eight seconds. But, we can give away a win n twenty-eight seconds. Why wasn’t I at defensive back? I would have intercepted the ball. I would have squelched, yeah I said that word, squelched Brandon Slower than me, aka Louisiana Whitening… I told Coach Coyle, I am more than the voice of authority, the voice of reason, I am the platinum playmaker and if I would have been permitted to make a play, this would be a victorious Child Please commentaries...
CP Commentary One: Someone as unaware as Coach Coyle was Kanye West, who snatched the VMA stage Sunday and told Taylor Swift Single Ladies should have won. Single Ladies? CHILD PLEASE. Carson Palmer listen to You Belong With Me and Love Story before every practice. Kanye snatched the stage not to make a point, not to right a wrong, because Kanye must always have the spotlight on Kanye… Ocho Cinco hates those that all about themselves.
CP Commentary Two: Speaking of the Video Music Awards, my man Platinum Smalls said Lady Gaga performed live from the Phantom of the Opera House of Crack. CHILD PLEASE. Chris Henry lived at the Phantom of the Opera House of Crack and there weren’t candles and dancers and white pianos and women hanging from the ceiling… Michael Irvin, Marshawn Lynch, and Amy Winehouse were always around…
CP Commentary Three: Saturday night, Floyd Money Mayweather returns to the ring. Now, Ocho Cinco know that Juan Manuel Marquez is a fellow Mexican and undefeated, but CHILD PLEASE, the man drink his own pee. Money is humble, just like the platinum playmaker and I would say he would win. But, he need to win and embarrass Juan, before urine be swallowed, not tested.
Chad Johnson: Until next time, this is Eighty-five, aka Ocho Cinco, aka the Black Mexican saying in Chad You Must Trust… Don’t drink your pee!

Contributor: Platinum Smalls

Today’s Entry Music

Run This Town

The Blueprint 3’s co-signature selection is both an examination of celebrity and an inspirational mandate. Jay Z’s lyrics are combative and confident. Kanye West’s lyrics are reflective. And Rihanna’s vocals are evocative, as she epitomizes the entrepreneurial spirit in fifteen words.

Life’s a game, but it’s not fair. I break the rules, so I don’t care.

Contributor: Platinum Smalls

Forget Swift, Jay Cutler Is Not Rapper’s Delight

During the 2009 MTV Video Music Awards, Kanye West assailed Taylor Swift. Hours earlier, West staged a similar tirade.

[Soldier Field: Chicago, Illinois]

[Jay Cutler is answering a reporter’s question inside the Chicago Bears locker room]

Jay Cutler: You know, the Bears haven’t had a Pro Bowl quarterback since Jim McMahon and you know, I want to provide that type of leadership.

[As Cutler concludes his answer, Kanye West enters and seizes the reporter’s microphone]

Kanye West: Yo, Jay. I’m really happy for you, but Jim McMahon was one of the best quarterbacks of all time.
[Cutler stares toward West with stunned silence]

Kanye West: In 1985, Jim McMahon won fifteen games, scored his second straight winning season and playoff appearance. In your whole career, you’ve won seventeen games, never had a winning season or been to the playoffs.

Jay Cutler: Kanye… How could you be so heartless?

Kanye West: Denver almost traded you and you cried. Jim McMahon was traded and said f the coach.
Jay Cutler: What are you saying? You want me to be stronger?

Kanye West: I’m sayin you an Indiana Boy, you livin the good life, you think you can touch the sky, but you ain’t ever won. You never won at Denver and you came from Vanderbilt.

Jay Cutler: Don’t think I’ll survive the flashing lights?

Kanye West: Jay, I’m happy for you, but you ain’t amazing. The Bears were in the Super Bowl two years ago and with you, they could all fall down.

Contributor: Platinum Smalls